Forever Forward

November 27, 2013

            This morning I put the top down on my car, turned the heat up full blast and shot down the road.  The sky was beyond blue and the white puffy clouds danced along the shelf between them and me.  I could see a sliver of the moon over staying its welcome.  The air was cold and brisk.  The smell was pine like.  The radio blared “Electric Avenue.”  It was a moment in time like no other moment in time and completely irreplaceable.

            For a moment I had conquered the world.  Beside me was a white kindle keyboard ready and willing to read my next choice.  I drove a convertible all over Spring Hill to visit patients and the copies of my book sat on my couch sporting my name in black ink.  The world was mine.

            I have a job, a convertible, a kindle keyboard, and money in the bank.  I am published with a book signing on December 14^th.  School is progressing as planned.  My life was back on track.  So, just hours from a four day weekend involving manatees, airboats, sunsets, fishing, and a restaurant called The Freezer ahead of me I coast through the 53 degree air on top of the world.

            I have freshly manicured hands, pedicured feet, and a haircut.   I can hardly remember the nights fighting the bugs even though my legs still sport the scars.  I have been sleeping on a bed long enough my muscles have almost forgot what it felt like to cram in the front seat of the truck and fight The Goat Man for space.  No more attack turtles, wet belongings, or wondering where the next meal will come from.

            Back to life as usual, The Goat Man and I’s adventures have changed course.  We are heading for personal interest now instead of survival.  We are starting to work on an online magazine I dreamed up a long time ago while sick in the master bathroom of a house my kids grew up in on Van Buren.  The magazine is called Do Not Eat The Chicken Salad.

            (A sneak peek at my business plan)

Do Not Eat the Chicken Salad (chicken salad) is an interactive website about cooking after the apocalypse.  AKWalraven, LLC intends to publish at regular intervals a recipe, re-cap video, and commentary for the public to view.

·      Recipe:  The recipe will be just that a recipe of what dish was made during the video.

·      Re-cap Video:  It is still in discussion how long the video should be.  For revenue purposes it has been proposed a small video be free and a subscription allowing a full video to be seen become available at a reasonable price.  The video will be a rendition of the recipe being prepared.

·      Commentary article:  This article will discuss any difficulties or tricks discovered throughout the cooking process, but more importantly it will rate the food based on the apocalypse categories.  The article will cover each area and assign a number value to the recipe or main food in the recipe.  Any other relevant information will also be discussed in the article.

o   The food will be judged on:

§  Sustainability – How well the food remains edible with and without refrigeration.

§  Portability – how easily the food is carried or kept in a bag for further eating during travel.

§  Nutritional advantages – Is this food good maintaining muscle, energy, or just wasted calories.  Basic nutritional information.

§  Availability – Where does this food grow naturally?  What environments can this food grow in?  Will it be available?

§  Ease of preparation – How quick can this be prepared?  Will it take days?  This may be a risk of others finding a person’s camp or of animals coming to eat.

Further development:  I would like to see more articles on the site to fill the days between the video presentations involving food on more of an educational emphasis.  Anything related to food nutrition, growth, storage, or the apocalypse would be accepted.  The FOE or SOB will judge each article subject individually for its relevant topic area before being published.

            The newest interesting twist is that The Goat Man is a prepper and very interested in articles and information about prepping.  I myself am more of a germ a phobic.  Basically, I want food without chemicals, pesticides, and steroids.  I want fresh food that has flavor because I love to eat.  Food is my first love and I would like to foster that relationship.

            Do Not Eat the Chicken Salad has a blog site already, (http://donoteatthechickensalad.blogspot.com/) so please go check it out.  I am crawling out of rock bottom and finishing my PhD, but it will be up and going as soon as I can.  I am making an extra effort to follow every single dream I have.

            Since October, The Goat Man and I have been living in a haunted house and it has yielded some very interesting stories.  I cannot do them justice on here, so I have begun my book.  I am writing a book about the beginning of The Goat Man and I that discusses homelessness (yes, that includes all the weird things I couldn’t put on the blog), the haunted house, and some real personal issues that need to be discussed. (These include PTSD, brain tumors, cancer, and addiction). 

            I am going to close this blog entry with the first page of the book.  I apologize for the long absence in writing, but after the book has been written everyone will see what has kept me busy.  Enjoy the first page.  And will somebody please tell the ghost I want the laundry room doors left shut!!!

The First Page:

            I sit here on the couch in this freezing room.  I can see my breath!  It was 80 a minute ago, but now I am frozen to the bone.  My skeletal system feels like it is made from metal just freshly pulled out of a snow bank in Alaska.

            I have lived in this house almost six weeks now, but it feels unfamiliar tonight in this very dim light.  It must be about three in the morning.  The air is thick and heavy in a very uncomfortable way.  This house has never felt this eerie before.

            I thought when we came here life was going to give us a break, but right now all I can do is dart my gaze around to examine the moving shadows in this room and pray what just happened never happened.  I am a logical person and my logic tells me something other than the reality I wish to believe.

            My logic tells me I just had sex with a demon!

            I do not mean a really bad person or a wild and out of control toddler, but a demon from the realm of spirits.  I am not sure why we call it a realm because that implies they stay there and we stay here.  It turns out it is a double standard, they are allowed to come into our realm, but we do not get to go to there’s.

            From what I can tell, I do not have any interest in going to the demon’s realm and I would appreciate if he stayed out of mine.  I prefer to deal with him directly, but he only comes in shadows, voices on the baby monitor, cold air, and unseen moved objects.  There is no respect from this demon.  He has been coming unannounced for weeks and just a couple of hours ago he told me his name. 

            He said his name was Herrick Jablonski born September 18, 1968.  He is just three years older than myself and he has not learned respect yet.  Now that we have gotten so personal I have questions.  I have tons of questions.

            Was he once alive?  If yes, how long has he been dead?  Am I supposed to be afraid of him?  What is he able to do in this realm?  How does he get here?  How does he leave?  What is it like in his realm?  Do they have bodies like us when they are in their realm and if I went to their realm would I be a spirit?

            Now I sit on this couch that belongs to a ninety seven year old woman who I care for and wondered how I got here.  I am freezing inside and out.  I am empty inside.  My stomach actually feels empty.  Although, I am thinking about the root beer and ice cream in the fridge, I am not going to eat until the weight of this air is removed.

            About two years ago I also arose at three in the morning with an empty stomach and ice-cold bones.  I had also just had sex, but it was with a demon of a different kind.  The sex that time was with the man I was married to.  That is the night this all started.

            I sat on my own couch that night.  It was a couch