Friday, November 29, 2013

Forever Forward


November 27, 2013

            This morning I put the top down on my car, turned the heat up full blast and shot down the road.  The sky was beyond blue and the white puffy clouds danced along the shelf between them and me.  I could see a sliver of the moon over staying its welcome.  The air was cold and brisk.  The smell was pine like.  The radio blared “Electric Avenue.”  It was a moment in time like no other moment in time and completely irreplaceable.
            For a moment I had conquered the world.  Beside me was a white kindle keyboard ready and willing to read my next choice.  I drove a convertible all over Spring Hill to visit patients and the copies of my book sat on my couch sporting my name in black ink.  The world was mine.
            I have a job, a convertible, a kindle keyboard, and money in the bank.  I am published with a book signing on December 14th.  School is progressing as planned.  My life was back on track.  So, just hours from a four day weekend involving manatees, airboats, sunsets, fishing, and a restaurant called The Freezer ahead of me I coast through the 53 degree air on top of the world.
            I have freshly manicured hands, pedicured feet, and a haircut.   I can hardly remember the nights fighting the bugs even though my legs still sport the scars.  I have been sleeping on a bed long enough my muscles have almost forgot what it felt like to cram in the front seat of the truck and fight The Goat Man for space.  No more attack turtles, wet belongings, or wondering where the next meal will come from.
            Back to life as usual, The Goat Man and I’s adventures have changed course.  We are heading for personal interest now instead of survival.  We are starting to work on an online magazine I dreamed up a long time ago while sick in the master bathroom of a house my kids grew up in on Van Buren.  The magazine is called Do Not Eat The Chicken Salad.
            (A sneak peek at my business plan)
Do Not Eat the Chicken Salad (chicken salad) is an interactive website about cooking after the apocalypse.  AKWalraven, LLC intends to publish at regular intervals a recipe, re-cap video, and commentary for the public to view.
·      Recipe:  The recipe will be just that a recipe of what dish was made during the video.
·      Re-cap Video:  It is still in discussion how long the video should be.  For revenue purposes it has been proposed a small video be free and a subscription allowing a full video to be seen become available at a reasonable price.  The video will be a rendition of the recipe being prepared.
·      Commentary article:  This article will discuss any difficulties or tricks discovered throughout the cooking process, but more importantly it will rate the food based on the apocalypse categories.  The article will cover each area and assign a number value to the recipe or main food in the recipe.  Any other relevant information will also be discussed in the article.
o   The food will be judged on:
§  Sustainability – How well the food remains edible with and without refrigeration.
§  Portability – how easily the food is carried or kept in a bag for further eating during travel.
§  Nutritional advantages – Is this food good maintaining muscle, energy, or just wasted calories.  Basic nutritional information.
§  Availability – Where does this food grow naturally?  What environments can this food grow in?  Will it be available?
§  Ease of preparation – How quick can this be prepared?  Will it take days?  This may be a risk of others finding a person’s camp or of animals coming to eat.

Further development:  I would like to see more articles on the site to fill the days between the video presentations involving food on more of an educational emphasis.  Anything related to food nutrition, growth, storage, or the apocalypse would be accepted.  The FOE or SOB will judge each article subject individually for its relevant topic area before being published.

            The newest interesting twist is that The Goat Man is a prepper and very interested in articles and information about prepping.  I myself am more of a germ a phobic.  Basically, I want food without chemicals, pesticides, and steroids.  I want fresh food that has flavor because I love to eat.  Food is my first love and I would like to foster that relationship.
            Do Not Eat the Chicken Salad has a blog site already, (http://donoteatthechickensalad.blogspot.com/) so please go check it out.  I am crawling out of rock bottom and finishing my PhD, but it will be up and going as soon as I can.  I am making an extra effort to follow every single dream I have.
            Since October, The Goat Man and I have been living in a haunted house and it has yielded some very interesting stories.  I cannot do them justice on here, so I have begun my book.  I am writing a book about the beginning of The Goat Man and I that discusses homelessness (yes, that includes all the weird things I couldn’t put on the blog), the haunted house, and some real personal issues that need to be discussed. (These include PTSD, brain tumors, cancer, and addiction). 
            I am going to close this blog entry with the first page of the book.  I apologize for the long absence in writing, but after the book has been written everyone will see what has kept me busy.  Enjoy the first page.  And will somebody please tell the ghost I want the laundry room doors left shut!!!

The First Page:
            I sit here on the couch in this freezing room.  I can see my breath!  It was 80 a minute ago, but now I am frozen to the bone.  My skeletal system feels like it is made from metal just freshly pulled out of a snow bank in Alaska.
            I have lived in this house almost six weeks now, but it feels unfamiliar tonight in this very dim light.  It must be about three in the morning.  The air is thick and heavy in a very uncomfortable way.  This house has never felt this eerie before.
            I thought when we came here life was going to give us a break, but right now all I can do is dart my gaze around to examine the moving shadows in this room and pray what just happened never happened.  I am a logical person and my logic tells me something other than the reality I wish to believe.

            My logic tells me I just had sex with a demon!

            I do not mean a really bad person or a wild and out of control toddler, but a demon from the realm of spirits.  I am not sure why we call it a realm because that implies they stay there and we stay here.  It turns out it is a double standard, they are allowed to come into our realm, but we do not get to go to there’s.
            From what I can tell, I do not have any interest in going to the demon’s realm and I would appreciate if he stayed out of mine.  I prefer to deal with him directly, but he only comes in shadows, voices on the baby monitor, cold air, and unseen moved objects.  There is no respect from this demon.  He has been coming unannounced for weeks and just a couple of hours ago he told me his name. 
            He said his name was Herrick Jablonski born September 18, 1968.  He is just three years older than myself and he has not learned respect yet.  Now that we have gotten so personal I have questions.  I have tons of questions.
            Was he once alive?  If yes, how long has he been dead?  Am I supposed to be afraid of him?  What is he able to do in this realm?  How does he get here?  How does he leave?  What is it like in his realm?  Do they have bodies like us when they are in their realm and if I went to their realm would I be a spirit?
            Now I sit on this couch that belongs to a ninety seven year old woman who I care for and wondered how I got here.  I am freezing inside and out.  I am empty inside.  My stomach actually feels empty.  Although, I am thinking about the root beer and ice cream in the fridge, I am not going to eat until the weight of this air is removed.
            About two years ago I also arose at three in the morning with an empty stomach and ice-cold bones.  I had also just had sex, but it was with a demon of a different kind.  The sex that time was with the man I was married to.  That is the night this all started.
            I sat on my own couch that night.  It was a couch

Friday, November 8, 2013

The last from The Goat Man


I apologize readers for the delay, for the lack of a picture, and for the quick write and go.  This was written by The Goat Man quite some time ago.  So, much has happened since then we are unable to get to the blog.  I was worried about devil's night, but it was Halloween night everything fell apart.

From The Goat Man
October 30
I don’t know if it is the time of the year, but I feel the excitement. I have always enjoyed Halloween.  I don’t know if the feeling of getting the shit scared out of you or scaring the shit out of someone else but I like this time of year. This house has brought back a lot of memories I had forgot.  I tucked them away for a time. You know sitting around the campfire with a bunch of kids in the middle of the woods. No one is around for miles, that kind of thing. It was the gang in the middle of the night, I think I miss the most just letting you know something was there, or maybe the things you new you put some place. But when you went to get them they were gone. Maybe it was mom yelling at us kids for moving things.  I didn’t realize how much I had missed it and the excitement grows every night that we are here just waiting to see what is going to happen next.   God, where do I begin? I didn’t realize how much I had missed it till we moved in here. I love it lol. I grew up in a small drinking community with a big farming problem. The house that we grew up in was built in the early 1800s; it was so old it still had the horse tie up in front of it.  It is still there to this day.  When my mom and dad sold it about 10 years ago it has been through 3 different owners, 2 of the families had kids, but they didn’t stay. The people that live there now don’t have any kids.  Mom used to say when us kids were screwing up they (the ghosts) were more active.  Yup, it was us boys. As a child I had the privilege of living in a haunted house.  Those of you that have grown up in one know what I mean.  There are people that say, oh hell no, but me I say hell yes. It just lets you know up there is something out there. But lets go back for a min, when we took on this job they told us we would see things and we have lol.  They told us we might hear things or maybe feel things. Yup, what the hell was that lol.  There are the things that move.  Yup, they move. Now when I was a kid my parents bought a fixer upper in town there were some things left in it, so they went to fixing it up and that’s when fun began. When we had the walls gutted, nothing on the walls, we were all sitting around eating pizza sitting on the floor no pipes above us and water poured out above us.  We went upstairs and there was no water on the floor. From then on the house was alive. My grandma, god rest her soul, would never stay there. we move the stair case next  and that’s when the lights got a mind of there own. We would get ready to go to bed, the old manual lights, dad would hit the switch and make it to the stairs and bam they would come back on.  It was liked this game.  It would go on for three or four times till dad would get mad and he’d start swearing and yelling then it would stop. We believe to this day it was a kid. Then there was an old hutch and table; they were a set in the house.  We found out later you couldn’t separate them. The old hutch had these old plates on it mom started put them around the house and we started getting are asses beat,  “leave them dam plates alone” but mom we didn’t do nothing with them.  But mom was convinced, “oh no you kids did.” we went away for a weekend and they moved themselves. Yup, living in that house was fun.  Then when us kids would screw up there was this old table, you know what I mean the old ones with the leaves that hung down, that told if my brother or me was screwing up.  Oh hell! That dam table would tell on us.  It would gong all night long nobody would get any sleep. Shit, mom would know then we get are asses beat lol.  The good old days. Then my brother and me would be fighting and the canning jars would start flying. Now lets go back to about a month ago, we were told you will see him, he will come to the door, maybe around the house, maybe in a window or walking in the house.  Second day we are here, doc says Goatman somebody is here, I wait. Nothing. I wait some more. Nothing. I go looking. Nobody here, WTH . Next day I tell doc I think Barney’s at the door. (Not his name but I think he will understand lol) A guy in a white shirt dressed up at the door. Nope nobody there. “But I saw him, Goatman.  I know I saw him yesterday too.”  Doc? WTH ? Next day, Docs getting I.H. ready and I hear a man voice over the intercom going. “easy easy” I knew Doc wasn’t feeling good and she was transferring I.H. to her chair, so,  I go see who she is talking to. It was just them two in there. Dam monitors.  Then, the next night we are are lying in bed the ceiling fan is on no movement in the room then, we feel cold, really cold.  Doc curls up like no tomorrow. I felt it to.  Shit she tried to climb on top of me. I felt the curtains move, they move every time it comes in then the voices come over the monitor.